Have you ever asked yourself what makes a family? It seems that blood and marriage mean nothing in the face of misfortune. For better or for worse were just lines recited, because when the “worse” reared its difficult head, the responses were frightening. Family is made up of those who stay by your side in the face of adversity. Most importantly, family is love. Love is tested by everything that has happened and everything that has changed. Love gives us the courage to continue on with day-to-day life. Love is what makes us cry and what makes us hope. Love is what makes us reach out to strangers and, in turn, love them as family too.

I’ve also learned so much about friendship in the past two months. My best friends have showed concern, given me a shoulder and sent their prayers to whatever gods they believed in, all with the hope of giving some comfort to me, to my Mom, to everyone affected by this accident. I am grateful that people have been there for me, because I don’t think I could have handled this on my own. The fact that my friends will check in allows me to talk about how things are progressing, about how I feel and allows me an opportunity to vent. If I held all this in, I would die.

My own strength has been tested. I’ve had to be strong for my Mom because this is even harder for her. She is watching someone she loves dearly struggle, but she’s kept at a distance. It’s so difficult on her, and I play the role of friend and family. I must listen, advise, and—most importantly—love her, because she is my mother and she has always supported me and would do so if it was me in this situation. Still, it’s been difficult for me to watch her endure this trial. What’s hardest, though, is visiting SW. I try to keep my head while I’m there, but it’s so hard not to cry. He’s not capable of being the same person, but he is—somewhere in there—the same good person he was before the accident.

Watching the recovery process has been difficult. I haven’t been able to visit as much as I would like to, but each time I do, he looks a little bit better. Most of the time, he knows who I am right away. There are times, though, when he mistakes me for my Mom or knows who I am but can’t remember my name. One time he compensated by calling me Denise Jr. His tone is different, though; he sounds confused. You know that feeling when you have right after waking up in a strange place and not knowing where you are? From his tone, I’d assume that’s what a traumatic brain injury is like all the time. Lately, he’s been very sad that he can’t go home. He cries, and asks my Mom or his sister or me to help him, because we are family. And family helps.

But we are helpless.

I worry that SW will never be able to comprehend the sentiments behind what we’ve written. And I constantly wonder how long this will take, and how we will weather this storm. At times we can feel completely overwhelmed by what is going on in our lives, but we keep hoping things will get better.

Things were good. I didn’t realize how nice life was until everything changed and the emptiness filled its place. Little things catch me off guard, and I wonder if that will ever change. Will things ever go back to being good, or will good be redefined?

We just have to take it a day, a week, a month at a time.

Al Franken might get to be a Senator.  According to one report he’s leading by 48 votes with about 1,600 absentee ballots (thought to favor him) to be counted.  Commenters on CNN’s Political Ticker seem to agree that if these folks don’t want people speculating, perhaps reports with random numbers illustrating who is ahead shouldn’t surface every few hours.  Interesting idea!  If this much attention had been paid to Florida in 2000, we might be driving cars that run on sunshine and love by now.

Speaking of the dude who is responsible for the deployment of my friend’s husband, Georgie made some pardons this week and now he seems to want us to pardon his pardon.  No, I didn’t drink the special eggnog before I wrote that sentence.  Bush wants the pardon of Isaac Toussie, who was involved with some false statements about mortgage fraud, re-examined.  In addition to that sour pardon, USA Today reports that Alan Maiss, who was pardoned of “concealing knowledge of a crime,” donated to Bush’s campaign in 2003 and 2004.  The list of pardons is pretty basic, but at the risk of being totally crass, I would like to point out that Bush also commuted the prison sentence of Reed Prior who was convicted of possession of methamphetamine with intent to distribute. (I apologized because I am now going to make the following joke: It was too soon to let Bristol Palin’s mother-in-law off the hook).

Exhibit A

I really should cover the Illinois Governor and his dumb scandal, but I really don’t see the point.  I mean, look at the guy.  He clearly looks like he sells used cars, so I’m not sure why everyone is so surprised that he was trying to sell a Senate seat.  I don’t think Obama was like, “Oh hey, why don’t you put this up on eBay and we’ll split the profit!”  So that’s the most justification I’m going to give that, because I don’t think it is all that interesting.  Sorry.

Everybody’s been weighing in about Obama picking Rick Warren to do the invocation at inauguration, so I’m going to join in.  Yes, the man disagrees with some foundation ideals of the Democrats and a lot of us have a right to be pissed off about it, but it’s kind of an olive branch to that whole red side of the country that we clobbered in November.  And, in case you didn’t notice, it’s a prayer.  At the beginning of the inauguration.  If we’re going to be pissed about anything, could it be that?  I really would love to see a greater separation of church and state, but that is another rant for a time when I’m not crashing from my sugar cookie high.  Also, can we put a spotlight on the fact that Joseph Lowry, “considered the dean of the civil rights movement,” will be giving the benediction.  Can I get an amen?