I had my first appointment with a new doctor on Tuesday. My heart rate was elevated. An EKG was ordered. Blood work in addition to the normal thyroid tests was ordered. Five tubes of blood later, I was back at the doctor on Thursday. My heart rate was still elevated. Sinus tachycardia and a referral to a cardiologist.

What the what? All of my other blood work was fine. It wasn’t my thyroid. Why on earth would I have sinus tachycardia if I wasn’t hyperthyroid?

Well, the answer is likely Wellbutrin.

I started the drug in May and never really followed up on it since I generally felt fine. It did its job and dissipated my “anger ball” that existed in my chest. Little did I know that it was making another thing in my chest go crazy. A little Google research and that was the only conclusion I could come up with.

So I quit. Cold turkey.

A few days into it, I’m fine. My heart rate at rest has been pretty consistant around 84, which I think is much better than 127. I quit Thursday night, and told the cardiologist, who ordered an echocardiogram tomorrow just to be sure. I have that appointment tomorrow, but if they don’t find anything, I swear I’m just going to cancel all my other follow up appointments.

I’m fine, and while I know it’s better to be safe than sorry, I know my body pretty well, and I know that I’m pretty much fine.

One of the reasons it took me so long to try an antidepressant was my aversion to putting strange things like that into my body out of fear that the side effects will be harmful. This doesn’t help matters.

We had a very busy end to December. It included Christmas with my family and his family, a vacation in Cambridge, MD and a trip to Cape May, NJ for New Year’s Eve with his friends from college. This past weekend we went to the AHL Outdoor Classic game and took a spontaneous Saturday road trip to the beach with friends from Hershey who came to visit us. I’m hoping that this week is somewhat mellow, and I hope that this weekend is relaxing. I’m exhausted!

I didn’t make any resolutions this year—yet. Tonight we chatted with Dan’s college roommate and our host from NYE who is starting a wellness coaching business. We may take him up on his offer to help us change our lifestyle so we are less sedentary and can get in better shape. Since we started dating, we’ve both gained a bit of weight. And it’s been especially hard for me to manage my time and stress with student teaching last spring and starting this new job with the long commute. I need to learn time management and I need to set goals. So my resolutions might kick in once we start that.

I’m also thinking about taking up art journaling. It might help with the wellness coaching and it might also help with my mental health, which has its own ups and downs—especially in winter.

Forever a resolution is post more. I always say that I will do that, but it’s so hard compared to what it used to be. The internet now has us trained to speak in 140 character bursts or reveal our whole life in a few sentences with a Facebook status. I want to change that for myself; I want to go back to expressing myself with paragraphs. There’s a lot I want to do in 2012, actually. Maybe I will sit down and make the list this week.

This freaks me out severely until I remember that I’m 27 years old and it is completely normal to be married and have children at this age.

I’ve ruminated on all of this before, but it never fails to dredge up some sort of odd jealousy in me. Realistically, I do not want to be engaged or married or pregnant, but I feel like I should be.

Never in a million years did I think that I would like the series, let alone enjoy it enough to sign up for a site like Pottermore. The language J.K. Rowling uses was part of what hooked me in. I think when I came across the word “tenterhooks,” I realized that this was YA that actually expanded minds rather than pacified them. I can stand behind that. Currently, I have ABC Family’s marathon on in the background as I write this. I’m also excited for Pottermore to move beyond the beta phase. I enjoyed reading the back stories for other characters and getting more information on the houses. I thought myself a Ravenclaw until I was initially sorted into Hufflepuff. On a second account, I was given the choice of Ravenclaw or Slytherin. That means I’m basically anything but Gryffindor, but I probably could have told you that without a Sorting Hat.

Seriously, if 16-year-old—or even 20-year-old—me knew I was writing this… In hindsight, I can’t believe how adamant I was about disliking this series! Oh well, I’ve since learned, and the series of books sits on my shelf. Now I just have to get the movies…

That might be an understatement.

On a typical day, I leave my house around 7:30 and drive to Chestertown while listening to BBC on satellite radio. Before this daylight savings time nonsense it was News Hour, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I suppose I’ll get used to the news program that is on after that, though today it was a lot of feature stories that were long and boring. Anyway, I drive to Chestertown and always get there 10 minutes later than I’m aiming for because I inevitably get behind a dump truck or tractor.

I work for several hours doing things I enjoy (for the most part). I am very lucky, actually. My job is pretty cool. I get to work on social media initiatives, do research, coordinate things and fill in the cracks when other people in the office need help. I’ve been compared to a swiss army knife.

Lunch is either at my desk or in the dining hall. Once in awhile I will go to the shopping center and pick up something at Rose’s on my lunch break. A floor mat. Scrubbing bubbles. Halloween makeup. But if I’m eating lunch at my desk, I am likely doing homework. That’s right, I’m still taking classes at Saint Joe’s. After this, I will only have one more semester.

I work a few more hours and then I bolt, typically at 4:30. Last week I had to stay later a couple of nights. It happens. I’m okay with that happening.

Another hour-long commute home, this time usually fighting off sleep. I will call my Mom or listen to Bloc Party at obscenely high volumes to stay awake.

Dan and I eat dinner, sit on the sofa, and go to bed. There’s usually some more homework in there. Sometimes there’s laundry.

So, I really don’t have a valid excuse for my lack of posting. I’m going to try to get better about that. Promise.