Archive for » April, 2010 «

What I’ve Been Doing This Semester

I’m wrapping up my first semester of online graduate work. After three semesters + one semester of student teaching, I will be certified to teach English in secondary schools. An additional two semesters will earn a master’s degree, but I’ve been told to hold off on that until I have a teaching job as starting a teacher off in the lower pay bracket appeals to schools more. My posting for this site has fallen behind because every week I’ve had to write two posts on Blackboard and then write five responses to classmates’ posts. I’m in the process of writing something for this site about my decision to teach, so expect that fairly soon. Until then, here is a post on motivation for my last Module in my Psychology of Teaching course.

Motivation is the driving force behind learning. Without motivated students, our efforts as teachers are essentially fruitless. So before we can create a constructivist class or establish expected behaviors among our students, it’s important that we understand motivation and how to encourage it in our classrooms. Various factors influence motivation. Learners’ curiosity, goals and self-efficacy as well as their expectancies and attributions play a role in how much (or how little) motivation they bring to class. As we strive to activate prior knowledge in our teaching, we must be aware that past learning experiences affect how students decide to engage in learning. “What happens as a result of past learning determines to a large degree whether students will engage in new learning at some time in the future” (Driscoll, p. 323).

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Is this real life?

Sometimes I feel like my world is standing still while my friends’ worlds are whizzing by at record paces. People around me are getting married, getting jobs, having kids, moving to foreign countries–they’re having life experiences and I’m… not.

Other times, it feels like my life is rushed and filled to the point of bursting. I feel like I’m barely clinging on to my sanity. I see people living happy, carefree lives and I envy them.

Perhaps the real situation is that everyone is somewhere between these two places. No one is completely carefree. We all have bills and deadlines to meet. Marriage, children, jobs, houses–they just compound the stress of life itself. In some ways I’m lucky that I do not have those things to worry about. My employment situation is glorified hobo and the white picket fence is a long way off. I won’t have to worry about a mortgage or diapers or contracts for a couple of years. Still, I have to keep telling myself that I’m working toward something or the day to day breathing becomes too much.

My dear friend and “little brother” wrote on my Facebook today that I have to be passionate about teaching. I think I am, but am I passionate enough? I really look forward to working with a classroom of my own, but I’m nervous. I’m more nervous about completing the process and jumping through the hoops of student teaching and Praxis testing, but it’s still just another stressful element in this path I have chosen for myself. And I’m always questioning if it’s the right path. I’ve had a good break from subbing due to PSSA testing and conflicting schedules, and I can honestly say that I don’t miss it all that much. I’ve already entered the mindset for my summer job, which might just be a necessary coping mechanism.

I wonder if I’ve missed my calling. I wonder if this is what I’m supposed to do. Friends–well, more likely friends of friends–would turn to religion here and pray for answers or something. I could consult my tarot cards. I could put my faith in what my friends tell me. I could believe in myself for once.

I’ve kind of hit a wall. I guess that’s what April is, and possibly always has been, for me. I think I was usually fairly frustrated by this time of year in undergrad, and most certainly in 2008 and 2009, I was slowly going crazy by this time of year. I want to be passionate about my classes, about subbing, about life–but right now I just keep asking myself two questions:

Is this real life? and

Can we go to the beach yet?

Indian River, May 2009

I need this.

I’m Not Dead Yet

I’ve been MIA for awhile now, and I really wish that wasn’t the case. I have several half-posts, which are half-written ramblings about the various goings on in my life. Some day, maybe, I will finish them and post them back dated to where they belong. Trips to WAC, trips to the beach, concerts, etc.–all waiting to be moved from my head to my WordPress.

Life has just been so busy lately that I feel guilty working on this stuff. I have a bunch of projects due for school and I’ve been working here and there. I’ve also been on the go doing regular life stuff, too. So I promise, I will be back in full swing, hopefully by May.